Grateful

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.

~Marcel Proust~

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Well, I been trying to do everything I need to do and make it a routine. I’m trying to wake up early and make it to work on time, go to school, do homework, read, study, and be a mom. I also have my son’s that go to school. I have to make sure there homework is done and correct. I need to make sure they understand why it is wrong or right.

I’m grateful for my friends that have stuck around even though I have not really been involved or been such a good friend. (Since School)

I’m grateful for my parents helping me taking care of my kids while I’m at school. Treating them like their own kids. Actually, even better than they treated us…lol but that’s okay.

I’m grateful for having such a great job that gives me the opportunity to go to school. Well, I do it after work hours but sometimes I have to leave earlier I get no complaints about that. I sometimes need 30 extra minutes for lunch to finish some reading or some homework as well.

I’m grateful for having such great co-workers that helped me out with studying or understanding a question I’m stuck on. I’m grateful for their encouragement o’ and breakfast that Helena brings in.

I’m also grateful for my brothers that help my son’s with their homework when I’m not around.

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So last night I had a dream, one of those dreams that are so weird but seem so real. Well, I dreamed about the father of my kids. Our relationship had ended about 3 years ago. I wonder all the times why I still have dreams about him. Of course he was involved in my life for 5 years before we split. We had a great relationship in the start, but it escalated to a harsh and complicated relationship that we decided the best was to call it quits. After legal difficulties I lost communication with him and decide to keep it that way. I’m no longer interested in involving myself with him again. I have accomplished so many goals since he has been out of my life. I have become a better person. However, I still have him in my dreams, some random thoughts with out the need for them WHY? WHY? WHY?

Sometimes I wonder if destiny is saying you should have worked it out. But maybe it’s saying this is the way it supposed to be. I’m accomplishing so much, I’m driving now, I’m going to school, and I’m more involved with my family and friends than before. But what if god gave me my soul mate and we were supposed to work it out and we didn’t even truly try?